Tuesday 28 July 2009

Let's Think Outside the Box for a Moment...

You know what makes me laugh about working in HR and Recruitment? The secret language, there are code words and phrases that everyone used. Everyone knows what they mean really but we can't just say that can we? Nooooo, political correctness and HR propaganda gone bananas, so here's some examples of the guff we send to the agencies.

  • We have candidates with similar exposure in a lower salary bracket - He's too damn expensive!
  • We have stronger candidates in a lower salary bracket - He's too damn expensive and not worth the money even if we had it!
  • You don't have the right exposure for our clients - You don't have enough experience. Yeah I said it, experience feel free to call the age discriminating police!
  • We have stronger candidates in the mix - What is this shit you have sent us?

See what I mean? Utter lunacy! And don’t even get me started on the Buzz Words…

“We are going to socialise this idea.” – Socialise? Socialise? So we are going to take the idea out get it drunk and introduce it to new people are we?

“We need to think outside the box on this one.” – Dear God! Have I been in a box this whole time and didn’t realise?

“Candidates in the mix…” - Mix? We are talking about people not raisins, they are not in a mix, mix is what you do when baking.

“We need someone who can hit the ground running.” – As opposed to all those people we hire who are just there to stand around looking pretty.

“There need to be as much visibility on this as possible.” – You there, open your eyes! Look at this!

Yes, Yes, I know what they mean, and I have even used them (it’s catching) but they are silly really…

3 comments:

  1. Nothing beats the smell of corporate bullshit in the morning air.

    Take a helicopter view
    Kick it into the long grass
    Blue sky it

    Gahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

    Enjoying the posts by the way. Keep up the good work.

    ReplyDelete
  2. @ HRD Thanks for reading, I believe you would be the only one not in my immediate family so all comments are welcome!

    ReplyDelete
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