It has come to my attention that the expression 'actions speak louder than words' is both apt and often misunderstood. I speak partly from experience and partly from my observations, you see I often wonder what people think of the stony faced girl in the corner, as often that can be me, and it occurred to me that if I have thought uncharitable thoughts towards that person that you have probably thought the same of me.
You see, 2008 was a hard year, in many ways, and as a result I find in 2009 I am not the same person I was. I, in no way think of this as a bad thing as a person should grow from year to year and learning from one's experiences and mistakes are the best methods for this. I am now far less trusting than I used to be, I am inclined to think the worst of people and I find cynicism comes quite naturally to me. When people object I say that I prefer to think this way as it lends to a life that is full of pleasant surprises instead of constant disappointment, but this is not entirely true. Yes, it is nicer to be surprised but that is not why I am cynical, I am cynical because that is what life has taught me, and I am nothing if not a good student. I'm sure I would be a much pleasanter person to have around if I smiled sweetly and was gaily optimistic about every man that asked for my number, or if I blithely trusted my employers to look out for my best interests, but, alas, I find that behaving in such a manner is not only stupid but unnecessarily painful. I salute those who have the energy and stamina to bounce back after very knock, but that, my friends is not moi. It is bad enough when they don't call, but it is worse when you were expecting, or dare I say, hoping they would.
So this is my point, that person we all know who sucks her teeth at the idea of a man fulfilling a promise, the girl who laughs sardonically when we are told that the redundancies are for the good of the company and the woman who rolls her eyes at the idea of the Boss being our friend; it is all too easy to write them off as a Bitch. I put it to you to wonder why? Life is hard, and London is harder, there is too much ego crammed within these grey walls. Most people have a long and hard day, underpaid and overworked at a job they could lose any minute, negotiating failing transport systems to get there in the first place. Couple this with a failing economy, knife crime increases, an everyday risk of cancer and stress levels are already high.
If London Life is hard, you’re already screwed if you are trying to maintain a London Love Life. Blood pressure and fatigue are already at dangerous levels, and you have trekked home just in time to receive a text message, "sorry, but..." Yeah, yeah you’re sorry, you didn't mean to sleep with me and never call, you didn't mean to flirt with me and then retract it all cause you sobered up and remembered your girlfriend, yeah, yeah, you didn't mean to. (You see? and I'm not surprised.)
In conclusion, I implore you instead of hissing bitch at the woman who cuts you up in order to jump on a tube, or the girl who is rude in a bar, think to yourself about what I have said and look for the pain behind the mask. Think about the last time you were rude to someone because your Boss was being an arse, or the last time you snarled at a passerby because you preoccupied with thoughts of what went wrong with that guy.
Bitch? Think again.